Oh gosh I feel like a failure. A complete and total failure. I'm not looking for pity here I just do.
I was doing so well and then hit some invisible wall. My head and my heart said "PUSH THROUGH DAMMIT" but I didn't and I faltered. I didn't gain any weight but I didn't lose what I wanted to (by 3 pounds). I don't feel stronger, I don't feel better, I don't feel happy. I feel like I've failed. Not even a little bit but a lot.
February is a new goal. Just do what I can. Do it when I can and how often I can and don't put limits on it. I'm hoping February starts off with a new job offer. This might be what I need. New people, new place, new energy around me. Work has drained me, physically, emotionally just drained the shit out of me. I've cried more days this month than I care to share. I've let it affect my personal life and my professional life. I snap at people who I shouldn't snap at and just hate where I am right now.
To quote Faith Hill, "I don't want pity I just want what is mine." my best possible life.
Thank you friends for loving me.
You are so loved! Don't be so down on yourself. You are just one meal away from being back on track. There is a divine reason God always keeps us moving forward and never back in time. We can only change what we are going to do; we have to move on from what we did. You'll get there. You're counting on you! :)
ReplyDelete